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Super Bowls: From Roman Numerals to Turnin’ left some 800 Odd times…

February 21st, 2019 · No Comments

Yeah, it’s me again, El Senor Sportyblog Scribe and Football Procastinator’ Touchdown Tommy here… With some more overly insightful Football lowdown; Hut-Hut, Omaha!

Oopsadaisy, Butterfingers! That’s’s el Correctomundo Kiddies’, I Didn’t watch duh Soupier doupier Bowl this year, or last. Or the year before…

As the last Super Bowl I can remember watching in its entirety, ended with that Uber Agonizing Seachickenz’ 4th-and-1 Goal-line BLUNDER Wayback during Super Bowl XLIX in 2015! As We Luvs’ Yuhs Darrell Bevell!

And haven’t even Dropped-in for some riveting Halftime Show’s entertainment since Lady Gaga’s 2017 performance during Super Bowl Li.

Which I enjoyed far more than Super Bowl 50’s Halftime Show featuring Coldplay with Biance ‘N Bruno Mars, which I vaguely recall being fairly Lame, albeit reportedly not nearly as LAME as this year’s Halftime show, Righto?

Since I missed All of Duh consternation over Vanilla five’s lead singer Wardrobe Malfunction…

But first I probably should acknowledge that I misspelled Patrick Mahoney’s name previously on Sportyblog. Uh, You say Mahoney, I say Majkowski…

As in former Green Bay Packers QB Don Majkowski, thou original “Majik Man,” whom I believe I Drafted for one of my few Fantasy Football Teams Wayback when? Uhm, could it have been the late 1980’s or early 1990’s? And All of this Magic’ talk’s making me think of a Pacific Northwest Band named Heart and one of their biggest Hit songs; But I Digress…

VIDEO: Heart’s Magic Man Song

Hence, Congrats to Kansas city Chiefs Quarterback Patrick Mahone, who’s consolation prize was being named the National Football League’s MVP for 2018. Although Arse-sumedly’ Patrick would much rather have been advancing to Super Bowl LIII, Uh Duh!

In typical El Senor Sportyblog Touchdown Tommy fashion, I watched; Err listened to very little of the NFL’s Final Four contestants games, just tinin’ into the L.A Rams v Saints just prior to Halftime for some lunchtime ambiance, for which the Rams were trailing Nawlins’ then, before dashing off to go visit the Goats.

Yep, we’ve got Goats Here in “sunny” Florence, Honest! And Thar names are Gawd Damn Harry & Ellie May; BBBAAAHHH…

Later that evening, I couldn’t stands itz Nomores’; Uhm, did someone say S’Mores? Hya! And tuned in for the fourth quarter of KC vs. those Dastardly Patriots, and was amazed over the Ariel Slugfest Tommy Terrorific’ and Pat “Magic Man 2.0″ Mahone were having.

Although naturally I was quite Disappointed over Brady & Co. marching down the field to victory on the very first drive of Overtime; SHIT!

As apparently there was almost as much noise being made over Tony Romo’s “Clairvoyant” Play Calling from the announce booth vs. The Call! Uhm, some botched, missed Referee’s call impacting Dem’ Saints from Marching on, Eh?

Rise of the TV Rules Analyst Shows NFL has A Problem

Thus, I had Zero interest in watching the super Bowl this year, since all I could come up with was Patriots Suck!

And then stumblin’ into another of the myriad ‘O daily sports stories on the Indianapolis Star that I peruse via my NFB Newsline for The Blind telephone service. I enjoyed listening to an article about IndyCar Driver Simon Pagenaud helping train Pistachio for the upcoming Puppy Bowl!

As Pistachio was the smallest Pooch on the Pitch for Puppy Bowl XV, and I actually got to hear this tiny 4lbs Furr-rocious Maltese in action when I turned on the Animal Planet during Super Bowl Sunday, WUF-WUF!

Pagenaud makes Furry New Friend in Puppy Bowl XV Contender

Not to mention laughing over the Hamsters in the Blimp and the Kangaroo Cheerleaders who didn’t know whom to punch? Whilst Team’s ruff ‘N Fluff were fighting over who’d win another Lambarki Bowl.

Which in case Y’all haven’t noticed, I was far more interested in the Puppy Bowl than this year’s Super Bowl, which apparently had far more scoring than that NFL game did…

Thus, from one GURR-REAT! Americun’ tradition to another, following the completion of Super Bowl, the sport’s landscape transitions to Duh Great American Race, thee Daytona 500, Roundy-rounds’ Super Bowl, when Americre’ turns it’s Attenzione to Daytona Beach, Florida’s High Banks Super Speedway and Stock Car racing.

As a year ago I was scribblin’ about Duh Great Americun’ Race and how the Disco Diva; Err Queen of Motor Racing, Danica Patrick was beginning her Retirement Swan Song with her “Danica Double.”

So, Just How GURR-REAT! Really was this year’s Great American Race?

As the allure ‘O RASSCAR’ has long since eluded Mwah, with about the only race I still hold mild curiosity over being the Season Kickoff DayToner’ 500. Although Thars’ just Somme-thun’ Wrong with it Not having its traditional 43 entries!

As Parker Kligerman, Matt DiBenedetto, B. J. McLeod, Tyler Reddick, Corey LaJoie, Ross Chastain, Chris Buescher, etc. Aren’t exactly Household Names…

Making nearly half of this year’s entry list unknown to Mwah, not to mention NASCAR’s Franchise; Uhm, I meant Charter Teams locking down 36 of the grid’s 40 starting spots, with a paltry 42 contestants total, this Ain’t Your Father’s RASSCAR’; Hya!

As six virtually unknown drivers jostled over the four “Open” Non charter Team’s grid positions, with two unheralded drivers and Thar team’s packing up ‘N goin’ home.

As there’s eight Daytona 500 Winners in this year’s field, including the reigning winner Austin Dillon. With seven NASCAR Series Champions racing at Daytona: Three in Ford’s and Two apiece in Chevy’s and Toyota’s.

As Jimmy Johnson, the racing driver, not Super Bowl winning Coach; Hya! Is the most decorated Driver in the field, as he’s the only Two-times Daytona 500 Winner, along with attempting to win his record 8th NASCAR Championship this year, so Move Over Tom Brady!

SHEEHZ! That’s the Most effort I’ve ever put into learnin’ about the DayToner 500’s current line-up or RASSCAR’ Taxicabland Bomber Pilotes’ contesting Duh GURR-REAT! Race…

Yet in another nod to the changing times, and NASCAR’s Desperation to appease Fans, Manufacturers and most definitely it’s Bottom-line, the race is being paced by Semi-retired Driver ‘lil E’, nee Dale Earnhardt, Jr., whose father was known as “The Intimidator,” although I preferred “Ironhead!”

As Dale Jnr will lead the field to the Green Flag in none other than a PickemUp’ Truck, a Chebbie’ Silverado, which I believe is Roundy-Rounds’ first Pickup Pace Truck? Which surely FOX “Expert Analyst” Mr. Boogity-Boogity-Boogity’, nee ‘Ol DW’, aka Darrell Waltrip will claim is another “First” for RASSCAR’, BARF!

As ‘Ol DW’s got a knack for Championing RASSCAR’, as it’s very Hard to believe this year’s Day Toner’s the 30th Anniversary of when I watched him Doin’ His Icky Shuffle impersonation in Victory lane; YOUCH! As Talk ’bout Datin’ yourself, Eh?

Since actually the Indianapolis 500 has used not one, but two Pace Trucks, for which one ranks as my most Ugly Pace vehicle ever at the Hallowed “Brickyard!” Being the 2002 Oldsmobile Bravado; Err, Uhm I meant Bravada, which Johnny Mellonhead’s former wife Elaine Irwin drove.

Whilst No Fenders Tacoma Bureau Chief Mary Ellen tried Flagging Down a Castoff of the other rare Pace Truck a few years ago; But I Digress…

What was that Mysterious vehicle that wouldn’t Stop for us…

As who’ll win this year’s 61st Daytona 500? And more importantly, how many will sit thru the race’s four hours Commercial-fest? Not to mention the 90mins Pre-amble, Eh?

As ‘Ol DW’ will Bark on Sunday afternoon; Boogity-Boogity-Boogity! Let’s Go Racin’ Boys!


→ No CommentsTags: Racing · Misc · Nascar · NFL Football · Uncategorized

An Overly “Fair Weather” Football Fans Sidelines View from the Land ‘O 12s’

January 21st, 2019 · No Comments

As Where’s good ‘Ol Peyton “HUT-HUT, OMAHA!” Manning when Yuhs need him, eh?

Think I heard his voice briefly once during thou litany ‘O Commercials during the start of that Do-or-Die Indianapolis Colts v Tennessee Titans Sunday Night Season Finale, before madly scramblin’ to find thou MUTE button; Holding!

And I’m Not predicting this, as your El Senor Sportyblog Scribe Touchdown Tommy tinkles thou ivories whilst most of Yuhs are watchin’ Sunday’s Week 2 Playoffs B-I-G’ Football games, but I think it would be Hilarious to have an All L.A. Super Bowl! Although first Doc’ Rivers has got to vanquish Tommy Terrorific’, nee Tom JACKARSE Brady…

For which when I checked the score via telephone I said DAMN! As it was 41-14 in the 4th Quarter with those Dastardly Patriots Zapping thou Lightning Bolts…

As I’m personally rootin’ for the L.A. Rams vs. KC and it’s Magic Man Patrick Mahoney, making that pronouncement before Sunday’s Chargers-Patriots, Saints v Eagles games.

but Hey Sports Fans, this Dribble’s courtesy of someone who’s watched an entirety of two full NFL Football games this entire season, as guessin’ Yuhs could say I’ve gone 3 ‘N Out again.

As somehow I find the intricacies of, or is it plight? Of being an NFL Kicker more interesting than the actual game itself, but first I’ve got to get this riveting Sportyblog story Down-field far enough for a kick at those Uprights Eh?

Prior to this year’s Playoffs, I watched a total of one National Football League game, a Thursday Night contest no less, featuring the New Orleans Saints vs. those overly Annoying Kuh-Boyz’, nee Dallas Cowboys. As I’m so happy they’re eliminated from the Playoffs after Thar Showboating Ad Nausea during that game; but I digress…

As Snowbyrd MJ’, a longtime Saints Fan was visiting and it was a comedy ‘O errors trying to find the game, since my television settings had inadvertedly been set to turn selected channels into El Spanol Unbeknownst to Mwah; Ariva-Ariva-Ariva!

Since when the very amiable Spectrum/Charter TV Installer hooked up my television months before, he set it to Descriptive aid setting for the Blind and Visually Impaired, which apparently causes only selected channels, primarily HBO and Showtime to switch to Spanish, Ci!

Not knowing what channel Thursday Night Football was on? We madly scrambled whilst trying avoiding being Sacked! Towards pulling up a television channel guide and trying all of the unlikely places first. CBS Sports? Nope!

NFL Network? Oh Shit it’s in Spanish,! Although we’d have to sit thru five-plus minutes of Commercials in English before hearing the Play-by-Play in Spanish; Huh?

As we howled in laughter before finally finding thou game on FOX, as I recognized Troy “Vanilla” Aikman’s voice on Thy Telie’; CRIKEYS!

That was difficult, not to mention the Saints losing - as I only knew what channel FOX was since I’d needed to know for a University of Washington Football game previously. As I’d vacillated over watchin’ the Apple Cup, before listening to my CD Audiobook instead…

Funny how it’s only two weeks ago, but I cannot remember which came first? Duh Chicken or? Oh yeah it must have been the Colts v titans Sunday Night game. But somehow the laconic droning of Al Michaels and Cragginess ‘O Chris Collinsworth, along with my main man Marcus Mariota being Out again was too much to endure, as I only lasted a single set ‘O Downs before switching my television off in favour of my book instead.

Next, although I’d predicted during Christmas that I was pretty sure that Ohio State would Manhandle my revered DAWGS’ in the Rose Bowl. For which Jonathan enjoys calling the Stuffed Puppies. I was so certain that OSU would trounce UW I’d originally decided to not watch Duh Game, but relented as curiosity got the better of Mwah.

But sadly, I grew overly annoyed by ESPN showing a little Football between outlandish amounts of Commercials! Along with the two announcers sounding like they were calling a Golf Match and Viola! With the Huskies down 14-3 at the end of the 1st Quarter, Yuhs guessed it! I once again switched off in favour of the Ken Follett book I was avidly listening to!

Another Season Comes and Goes, as Pac 12 Struggles to Keep Up

Next, although I’d hoped to listen to “The Voice” of the Seahawks, Steve “TOUCHDOWN SEAHAWKS!” Raible, I’d not perused getting the Internetz’ Click Here/Continue screen figured out, so relied upon the FOX TB Broadcast instead.

as naturally they’d have Troy Aikman in the booth for the Seahawks vs. Cowboys Wildcard Playoff’s at Jerry’s House in Arlington, Texas.

And it’s funny since I’m really not a football Fan, but could come up with the analogy on my own that the Hawks had reverted to Ye ‘Ol Wayback Days of “Ground Chuck!” Run to the Left, run to the Right. Run up the Middle and then Punt!

As that’s what ‘Ol Chuck Knox had a penchant for doing, while it’s ironic that another former Seattle Head Coach, Tom Flores is being considered for Hall of Fame Honours this year.

And although I’m told that the Seahawks Offensive Coordinator Calls were the problem. How much fault should lay at “Mr. Excitement,” nee Pete Carroll’s Doorstep for not over riding Brian Schottenheimer’s Play Calling?

Growing so annoyed over the Seahawks inability to move the pigskin, once again I switched off prior to the end of the 1st Half and therefore missed seeing Steven Whats-his-Name? Err Stan Janakowski? Pull his Groin, Uhm Hamstring on a muffed 57yd Field Goal attempt - leaving the Seahawks without a Kicker the entire second half!

Yo Seattle, Yuhs get’s What Yuhs Paid for! As glad you let Stephen Hooska-Dooska! Hauska amble off to Buffalo in Free Agency, Righto?

And Speakin’ of Kickers, I had to laugh when checking the scores to read that, Whale’, actually listening via my NFB Newsline for The Blind telephone service, about Cody Parkey’s Heartbreak Bing-Bing-Bing, Ricochet Rabbit! Game losing 43yd Field Goal attempt, when the Eagles defeated Duh Bears 16-15.

As Kudos to the Goose Bay Brewery in thee Windy City for good naturedly challenging everybody who thought kicking field goals’ was easy! Challenging all takers to what I thought I heard originally was Free Beer for a Year? If anybody could make a 43yd Field Goal.

For which Thar were over 100 persons who took thou Challenge, going 0-for-101 Attempts! With the Brewery Donating $20,000 dollars to Charity.

Fans go 0 for 101 attempting Cody Parkey Challenge at Chicago brewery

But Hey! Even “The GOAT!” Nee “Greatest of All Time” Kicker’s Adam Vinatieri even misses. Apparently missing what was considered a Chip Shot during the Indianapolis Colts lost to the Kansas City Chiefs at a very Snowy Arrowhead Stadium.

As I even heard the Headline ’bout how somebody was having fun with Vinatieri’s WICKEDPedia’; Err Wikipedia page. Having substituted his picture with that of a Goat; Hya!

Missing Kicks in the Playoffs is Nothing New for Adam Vinatieri

→ No CommentsTags: Misc · NFL Football · College Football · Uncategorized

Sportyblog’s Rousing Rendition of Ye Classic X-Mas Song

December 28th, 2018 · No Comments

Howdy Sports Fans, as I’m just Dashing Off, Did somebody say Dashing? Err Dancer, Prancer and what’s his name Rudolph, Eh? Since I just heard ’bout this lately via The Seattle Times Oddities section, albeit it’s been going on awhile now…

Glowing Antlers Fail, so Farmers try App to Save Reindeer

Sorry ’bout that, as I’m just dispatching the short, Radio Only “singles” version of a ‘lil ditty I scribbled Wayback several years ago here on Sportyblog; HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-HUT!

The Twelve Days of Sports - 2014 edition

And following up that year’s Hit rendition is this newly minted smash record’s recording, for which ‘Ol Casey Kasme sez’ is Climbing Up thou “Billboard” Charts; Hya!

Since after all, it’s Duh Commishes favourite Yule Tide glee… Did somebody say hit? Nope, DON’T Yuhs dare punch me Raymond! Err, Kareem, Oh Never Mind Yuhs Bullies!

On the Twelfth Day of SportyMas Roger Goodell said to me;
Football, we DON’T need any STINKIN’ Fooh-Fooh Faux English style Football in Americre’ like that Namby-Pamby English Premiere League, as only Americre’ plays REAL Football here in ’tis great land ‘O thee…

On the Twelfth Day of SportyMas Roger Goodell said to me;
Seahawks Twelfth Man raises the Flag!
Eleven Silver Stanley Cup Winners trophies
Ten Bites ‘O Beef Jerky
Nine NFL Lawsuits
Eight Second Sound Bytes
Seven Prickly Pear Cacti
Six Rams Draft Picks for RG3
Five MLS Cups
Four Overweight Suitcases
Three ‘RASSCAR Roundy-round Championships for Roger Penske
Two Wins for the lowly Raiders is SWEET!
And an Ineligible Personal Conduct policy!

And remember Y’all; Seven foot one inch Shaq can’t sing these Christmas carols any better than Sir Charles; Ho-Ho-Ho!

Although my personal Numero Uno favourite version of Ye classic Christmas Carol; NO! I didn’t call your name Pete! Is that long forgotten Duo of Hosers’ from Up North Eh! Thee Brothers Mackenzie, nee Bob and Doug, as “Take Off Eh!”

VIDEO: Bob & Doug McKenzie’s 12 Days ‘O Christmas Song


→ No CommentsTags: Misc

Hunting for Nebulous Sports Tie-ins on thou Oregonian Coast…

December 20th, 2018 · No Comments

Otay Sports Fans, once again your El Senor Sportyblog Scribe Touchdown Tommy’s struggling to poond out another riveting Sports story for your Consumption, as the Mighty Pacific Ocean nearby relentlessly Churns away…

As I’ve just learned of a new term, Denoted in my telephone news “Severe” Weather Alert for thou Oregonian coast, with a Double Whammy ‘O High Surf & High Wind Warnings. As the message sez’ to be aware of potential “Sneaker Waves” in the High surf of 18-22 foot cresting to 22-25 foot waves; aye Karumba!

As I’ll let Y’all Lookie-Sea’ what a Sneaker Wave is, ‘R Mateys!

Not to mention sustained winds of 35-40mph with Gusts up to 60mph, which means it’s a very good day for me to stay inside my “bungalow by The Sea” during my first Winter’s Storm, Eh!

Alas, if I was savvy enough I’d tune-into “The Voice of The Seahawks” Steve “HOLY CATFISH!” Raible via Seattle’s KIRO 97.3FM via Zed Internetz’, albeit it rightly should be Messer Raible going Hoarse from Yelling his trademark “TOUCHDOWN SEAHAWKS!” repeatedly by the City by The Bay, vs. them lowly 40-WHINERS’…

but the Webpage wants me to click on some button THAT I CANNOT s-e-e for a new tab which I Don’t understand. So I’ll await Sportyblog’s Chief Technical Officer “Mr. Sporty’s” assistance later, as he’ll be firmly ensconced in thou Days riveting Pigskin Games from morning to night; But I digress…

And speaking ‘O Football, I won’t even bother trying dissecting another Disgusting Domestic violence incident perpetrated by another NFL Football Player. Since presumably Y’all know about the Kansas City Chiefs Star Running Back Kareem Hunt, Righto?

Why Does it take a Video to move NFL to Action against Assaults on Women?

Other than there Absolutely shouldn’t be any “Wiggle room” for anybody displaying such Despicable Behaviour towards others, especially “Star” NFL running Backs, et Al, regardless of taking somebody away from the National Football League’s Capitalistic Gravy train; Hut-Hut Omaha!

Family of Former Kansas City Chiefs Star Kareem Hunt has History of Criminal Behavior

As it seems somewhat ironic, karmic or symbiotic that the tack I’d originally planned to take for this Sportyblog post is nebulously connected to the very same National Football League Franchise, albeit needing to stretch out Dem’ Chains, but you’ll see My Oh, so Clever tie-in hopefully? As I’m going for I-T on 4th and just inches; Hya!

Doing my typical Nightly News Trawl for topics ‘O interest, I ran across the name of Caroline Rose Hunt in the New York Times Obituary section earlier this Fall, for which her last name sounded vaguely familiar.

Hmm? Wracking thy Cranium, I mused to Thyself isn’t (Major League Soccer’s MLS) U.S. Open cup also known as the Lamar Hunt Cup? For which although the Rave Green crumpled in the MLS playoffs to thou rival Portland Timbers earlier this season. Nonetheless, the Seattle Sounders FC have previously made waves in that particular championship.

Sounders FC make Open Cup History

But back to Thy Nebulous Sporting connection, Eh? As I read; Err listened to the Caroline Rose Hunt article via my NFB Newsline for The Blind telephone service, I chuckled to Thyself thinking how I’d never put the connection together before, especially since Caroline’s brothers were so well known for Thar different business exploits.

Caroline Rose Hunt, 95 Dies, Turned Inheritance into Vast Wealth

As the New York Times story denotes, Caroline’s father Haroldson Lafayette Hunt, Jr., better known publicly as H.L. Hunt was a phenomenally rich Oil Tycoon, with various Hunt Petroleum companies, and was apparently prolific in the Bedroom also by squiring fifteen children by three different women over 35yrs.

As H.L. Hunt was believed to possibly be the Richest Man in the World at the time of his Death in 1974, leaving the bulk of his estate to his first seven children, including Caroline, who at one point in time, was the Richest Female in Americre’.

Caroline’s four brothers included H.L> “Hassy” III, Nelson “Bunker,” William “Herbert” and Lamar Hunt. As presumably Mr. Sporty is well acquainted with Bunker & Herbert’s Silver exploits, when they tried cornering the World’s Silver Market, before causing its ultimate collapse on “silver Thursday” in 1980!

whilst Haroldson Lafayette “Hassy” III, the only older brother of Caroline’s is largely ignored, presumably due to his having been given a lobotomy following being diagnosed with Schizophrenia in the early 1940’s.

Yet it’s the Brother’s Hunt’s youngest sibling whom uze “Stick ‘N Ball” Sports Fans will obviously be most interested in, as Lamar, who apparently only dabbled lightly in Bunker & Herbert’s precious metals concern, was a major force in American Professional Sports for over four decades.

Lamar reportedly was a Huge Sports Aficionado his entire life, and even played Football Collegiately, before turning his attentions to Ownership instead.

Having wished to purchase a National Football League Franchise in the late 1950’s via his extreme wealth, the NFL turned him down on the basis of not wanting to over expand. Thus having approached other wealthy entrepreneurs, notably another Texas Oilman named K.S. “Bud” Adams, future owner of the Houston Oilers. These Businessmen led by Lamar, known as the “foolish 8″ created the rival American Football League, better known simply as the AFL in 1959.

Lamar subsequently created his AFL Charter Franchise the Dallas Texans in 1960, who were not related to the NFL’s folded Franchise of the same name playing for one season in ‘52. Before the NFL attempted to Quash his team by inserting their own Texas Franchise, which Y’all might know as the Dallas Cowboys.

With attendance of Lamar’s Texans dwindling, vs. Americres’ Team the Cowboys, he finally moved the team to Kansas City in 1963, becoming the Kansas City Chiefs, and the rest as they say is History.

Lamar is also credited with coining the term Super Bowl, for which he sez’ probably came from his children then playing with a Superball toy. For which Hunt’s Chiefs with his first Head Coach, a man named Hank Scram, later inducted into the NFL’s Hall of Fame won the final rival leagues Championship in 1970, better known as Super Bowl IV today - before the AFL merged with the NFL.

Lamar was also enchanted with another form of Football, one us Yanks’ prefer to calling soccer. As Lamar was instrumental in the formation of the NASL, nee the North American Soccer League, the predecessor to today’s Major League Soccer, for which he was also an initial investor in ‘96.

As Lamar owned the NASL’s Dallas Tornado, which won “Soccer Bowl ‘71,” and then later the MLS’s Kansas City Wizards, known today as Sporting KC. Along with owning the Columbus Crew and FC Dallas.

As noted previously, the U.S. Open Cup, Soccer’s oldest Stateside trophy was renamed the Lamar Hunt Cup in honour of his pioneering role in the development of soccer professionally in North America during both the NASL and MLS leagues.

Lamar also was a minority owner in some National Basketball Association Franchise called the Chicago bulls until his death at age 74 in 2006.

Lamar also co-founded World Championship Tennis, whilst he was unsuccessful in his quest for a National Hockey League Franchise. Being Frozen out of his co-owner bid for what ultimately became the Columbus Bluejackets franchise…

→ No CommentsTags: Misc · soccer · NHL Hockey · NFL Football · NBA Basketball · Uncategorized

Pacific Northwest Icon Times Out…

November 8th, 2018 · No Comments

Ah, once again your humble el Senor Sportyblog Scribe Touchdown Tommy’s running; Err more like Stumblin’ along in first gear; But I Digress.

As surely by now, Y’all have heard the news that Paul G. Allen has Died at the Age of 65 from Non Hodgkin’s Lymphoma disease.

Microsoft Co-founder Paul Allen Dies at Age 65

Mr. Allen, whom many of you in the Sporting World will know was the owner of the Seattle Seahawks NFL Franchise, for which Allen saved the team from the ruinous Ken “bubbah” Bearing, who’d actually tried moving it to “Thee City of Angels,” aka Los Angeles, California early in 1996, before Allen bought the team for $194 million.

As part of Allen’s condition for buying the team and keeping it in Seattle was the passing of a local Bill for Taxpayers to Approve Funding of a New Stadium to replace the aging Kingdome, which first was known as Seahawks Stadium, then QWest Field, when the Hawks’ were in Quest of a Championship! And ultimately as today’s Der Clink’, nee Century Link Field.

But more about those Championship winning Seahawks shortly, since ironically I’m poondin’ out another riveting Sportyblog story right now upon a product of Mr. Allen’s legacy, albeit I’m using a very outdated, retired copy of Microsoft’s Office 2007, which is causing me Fits ‘O Agony right now, but Who Bloody Cares, Righto?

As it seems to me in Motor Racing parlance, Wayback in the Good ‘Ol Dayzes’, when you were either an A.J. Foyt or Mario Andretti Fan, when I was being introduced to the world of Personal Computers you were either a Microsoft Devotee or a MAC’ User, with Apple users Despising the world of MS!

Yet Microsoft’s not been All Shiny, Bunnies ‘N Rainbows for Mwah, as they tried unsuccessfully to Cram their All Digital, Touch screen, Colour Coded “Tiles” Technobabble Down our Throats; Uhm, under our Thumbs? With that Abomination known as Windows 8! For which I specifically had the very Confuzer’ I’m typing on now custom built to utilize Windows 7 instead.

Microsoft Wins the Race!

But back to the world of Stick ‘N Ball Sports since that’s what Y’all are here for presumably, Eh? As I suppose it’s somewhat symbiotic that Paul, Hey Paul really is Dead! As that’s an ‘Ol Beatles line; Hya! Uhm, that Paul’s Left the Building as the Mighty Legion of Boom’s dissipated and the Hawks are in rebuilding mode.

As we All know that under Allen’s watch, the Hawks went to all three of their Super Bowl appearances, Circa 2006, 2014-15 and were victorious in Super Bowl XLVIII when Thrashing some dude named Payton Manning and the Denver Broncos 43-8; YEEHAW!

While Devotees of Roundball, nee Basketball, will know that When at the youthful age of 35, Paul bought the Portland Trail Blazers National Basketball Association Franchise Wayback in 1988 for $70 million “Sawbucks.”

As I tend to recall hearing the story that Allen had a regulation sized NBA Full court “Playground” installed underneath his house upon Mercer Island, or was it Medina?

And when I think of who my good friend Carpets’ likes reminding me of being known as the Jail Blazers, when I think of the Portland Trail Blazers of that era, I immediately think of Clyde “the glide” Drexler, Kevin Duckworth, Terry Porter and Jerome Kersey.

Although I’d forgotten about Head Coach Rick Adelman who led the Blazers to their final two NBA Finals appearances in 1990 and ‘92. When Portland also won their final two of three overall Western Conference Finals, ultimately losing to the Detroit Pistons and Chicago bulls respectively.

According to Folklore, the Blazers a la the Chicago Bears infamous “Icky Shuffle” and accompanying Dance Song wrote two songs of their own, with the Hit Rip City Rhapsody being used during their run-up against those Pesky Detroit Pistons ‘90 Championship Showdown.

VIDEO: Rip City Rhapsody

And whilst rehashing Portland’s History, somehow I’ve totally forgotten that the Seattle superSonics only NBA Finals winning Head Coach and Hall of Fame inductee, thou Great Lenny Wilkens also patrolled the Blazers Bench between 1974-76.

As Wilkens finished his playing career at Portland during the 1974-75 season before solely being Head Coach the following season before subsequently taking over the reins of the SuperSonics.

With Portland’s last nebulous tie-in to Roundball being that current Indiana Pacers Head Coach Nate McMillan was Portland’s leader from 2005-2012. While ironically Nate played Guard during the SuperSonics latter Glory Days for Bernie Bickerstaff and George Karl, where he played his entire NBA career.

And Don’t forget Allen’s Yes Man “Trader Bob,” aka Bob Whitsitt who was General Manager of both of Allen’s Professional Sports Teams, with Whitsitt being instrumental in the building of Seahawks Stadium, hiring Mike “The Walrus” Holmgren and returning the Seahawks to the NFC.

Yet Allen had other interests, or passions, for which I know a little about a few of them, since they’re all related to my former Home, thee Emerald City or Jet City, nee Seattle.

As Allen’s (FHC) Flying Heritage Collection based at Paine Field in Everett, WA boasts a fantastic collection of flying World War II Aeroplanes, for which I used to be able to hear flying overhead towards Lake Washington during Seafair weekend and other times during the year.

And I also know vaguely of his Stratolaunch Systems venture in the Mohave Desert, as Allen’s formerly known Vulcan Aerospace venture, One Small Step; Err part of his
Vulcan Incorporated “Holding” company was building a humungous twin fuselage 747 sized Aircraft to launch Satellites into Space.

Officially known as the Model 351, the World’s largest aircraft sports a wingspan of 385-386 feet, which is longer than either the legendary Spruce Goose’s or a Saturn V rocket!

A Day of Infamy, 75 Years ago…

While the last time I noticed Paul’s name in the news was when recently he Spearheaded a scientific research team that discovered the World War II Battle Cruiser USS Indianapolis in the Philippines at a depth of 18,000 feet during August, 2017.

As the USS Indianapolis was sunk by the Japanese late in the war,
on July 30, 1945. After delivering components of the weapons used for one of the two Atom Bombs subsequently Dropped upon Japan on August 6th and 9th respectively. And was the U.S. Navy’s largest single loss of life during the war.

While on another tangent Allen briefly? Dabbled in exotic cars, since I’ve got zero clue if he was a “Car Guy” or not? With the vehicle in question being one of the Uber Rare Porsche 959’s, for which a scant total of 345 were produced.

As the Ultimate 911 has a storied past here in the Pacific Northwest, as some chap named Gates, perhaps Y’all have heard of him? As in a one Mr. Bill Gates of Microsoft fame along with company co-founder Paul Allen tried importing a pair of the non-U.S. Emissions legal chassis into the country with both cars being immediately scooped up by customs Agents upon a pier in San Francisco I believe.

Then Mr. Gates, and presumably Mr. Allen’s Porsche’s sat impounded for 13yrs prior to the pair getting a “Show & Display” law successfully passed in order to allow them the ability to drive their Porsche 959’s in the United States…

Another relic from Microsoft’s Dustbin…

And if Yuhs haven’t guessed already, Messer Allen’s fingerprints are all over Seattle in multiple guises, one such being the futuristic Frank Gehry designed building at the Seattle Center, for which the Monorail briefly passes thru. Which were built for the World’s Fair in 1962!

The multi-coloured building, which has been described as looking like a smashed guitar to Mwah, will forever be known by its original name, the Experience Music Project, or simply EMP.

although it’s undergone a multitude ‘O name changes since it’s Y2k debut, and now sports the moniker Museum of Pop Culture, or simply “moPOP.”

Having visited EMP last a long, long time ago, specifically to see Jimi Hendrix’s guitars that Paul Allen bought, and much later he’d also acquire Captain Kirk’s commanders chair from the Enterprise! Which makes it easy to see where his company’s name Vulcan Inc comes from, eh?

Not to mention renovating another Seattle Landmark, the legendary Cinerama movie theater in Downtown Seattle, where as a Wee lad, I attended the premiere engagement of the first Star Wars movie Wayback in 1978; YIKES!

Yet how many people know that Allen actually brought two championships to date to Seattle? The latest being for the raucous Rave Green Sounders FC Fanatics. As Allen was a part owner of the Major League Soccer’s Seattle sounders FC Franchise which won the MLS Cup in 2016…

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