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Super Bowls: From Roman Numerals to Turnin’ left some 800 Odd times…

February 21st, 2019 · No Comments

Yeah, it’s me again, El Senor Sportyblog Scribe and Football Procastinator’ Touchdown Tommy here… With some more overly insightful Football lowdown; Hut-Hut, Omaha!

Oopsadaisy, Butterfingers! That’s’s el Correctomundo Kiddies’, I Didn’t watch duh Soupier doupier Bowl this year, or last. Or the year before…

As the last Super Bowl I can remember watching in its entirety, ended with that Uber Agonizing Seachickenz’ 4th-and-1 Goal-line BLUNDER Wayback during Super Bowl XLIX in 2015! As We Luvs’ Yuhs Darrell Bevell!

And haven’t even Dropped-in for some riveting Halftime Show’s entertainment since Lady Gaga’s 2017 performance during Super Bowl Li.

Which I enjoyed far more than Super Bowl 50’s Halftime Show featuring Coldplay with Biance ‘N Bruno Mars, which I vaguely recall being fairly Lame, albeit reportedly not nearly as LAME as this year’s Halftime show, Righto?

Since I missed All of Duh consternation over Vanilla five’s lead singer Wardrobe Malfunction…

But first I probably should acknowledge that I misspelled Patrick Mahoney’s name previously on Sportyblog. Uh, You say Mahoney, I say Majkowski…

As in former Green Bay Packers QB Don Majkowski, thou original “Majik Man,” whom I believe I Drafted for one of my few Fantasy Football Teams Wayback when? Uhm, could it have been the late 1980’s or early 1990’s? And All of this Magic’ talk’s making me think of a Pacific Northwest Band named Heart and one of their biggest Hit songs; But I Digress…

VIDEO: Heart’s Magic Man Song

Hence, Congrats to Kansas city Chiefs Quarterback Patrick Mahone, who’s consolation prize was being named the National Football League’s MVP for 2018. Although Arse-sumedly’ Patrick would much rather have been advancing to Super Bowl LIII, Uh Duh!

In typical El Senor Sportyblog Touchdown Tommy fashion, I watched; Err listened to very little of the NFL’s Final Four contestants games, just tinin’ into the L.A Rams v Saints just prior to Halftime for some lunchtime ambiance, for which the Rams were trailing Nawlins’ then, before dashing off to go visit the Goats.

Yep, we’ve got Goats Here in “sunny” Florence, Honest! And Thar names are Gawd Damn Harry & Ellie May; BBBAAAHHH…

Later that evening, I couldn’t stands itz Nomores’; Uhm, did someone say S’Mores? Hya! And tuned in for the fourth quarter of KC vs. those Dastardly Patriots, and was amazed over the Ariel Slugfest Tommy Terrorific’ and Pat “Magic Man 2.0″ Mahone were having.

Although naturally I was quite Disappointed over Brady & Co. marching down the field to victory on the very first drive of Overtime; SHIT!

As apparently there was almost as much noise being made over Tony Romo’s “Clairvoyant” Play Calling from the announce booth vs. The Call! Uhm, some botched, missed Referee’s call impacting Dem’ Saints from Marching on, Eh?

Rise of the TV Rules Analyst Shows NFL has A Problem

Thus, I had Zero interest in watching the super Bowl this year, since all I could come up with was Patriots Suck!

And then stumblin’ into another of the myriad ‘O daily sports stories on the Indianapolis Star that I peruse via my NFB Newsline for The Blind telephone service. I enjoyed listening to an article about IndyCar Driver Simon Pagenaud helping train Pistachio for the upcoming Puppy Bowl!

As Pistachio was the smallest Pooch on the Pitch for Puppy Bowl XV, and I actually got to hear this tiny 4lbs Furr-rocious Maltese in action when I turned on the Animal Planet during Super Bowl Sunday, WUF-WUF!

Pagenaud makes Furry New Friend in Puppy Bowl XV Contender

Not to mention laughing over the Hamsters in the Blimp and the Kangaroo Cheerleaders who didn’t know whom to punch? Whilst Team’s ruff ‘N Fluff were fighting over who’d win another Lambarki Bowl.

Which in case Y’all haven’t noticed, I was far more interested in the Puppy Bowl than this year’s Super Bowl, which apparently had far more scoring than that NFL game did…

Thus, from one GURR-REAT! Americun’ tradition to another, following the completion of Super Bowl, the sport’s landscape transitions to Duh Great American Race, thee Daytona 500, Roundy-rounds’ Super Bowl, when Americre’ turns it’s Attenzione to Daytona Beach, Florida’s High Banks Super Speedway and Stock Car racing.

As a year ago I was scribblin’ about Duh Great Americun’ Race and how the Disco Diva; Err Queen of Motor Racing, Danica Patrick was beginning her Retirement Swan Song with her “Danica Double.”

So, Just How GURR-REAT! Really was this year’s Great American Race?

As the allure ‘O RASSCAR’ has long since eluded Mwah, with about the only race I still hold mild curiosity over being the Season Kickoff DayToner’ 500. Although Thars’ just Somme-thun’ Wrong with it Not having its traditional 43 entries!

As Parker Kligerman, Matt DiBenedetto, B. J. McLeod, Tyler Reddick, Corey LaJoie, Ross Chastain, Chris Buescher, etc. Aren’t exactly Household Names…

Making nearly half of this year’s entry list unknown to Mwah, not to mention NASCAR’s Franchise; Uhm, I meant Charter Teams locking down 36 of the grid’s 40 starting spots, with a paltry 42 contestants total, this Ain’t Your Father’s RASSCAR’; Hya!

As six virtually unknown drivers jostled over the four “Open” Non charter Team’s grid positions, with two unheralded drivers and Thar team’s packing up ‘N goin’ home.

As there’s eight Daytona 500 Winners in this year’s field, including the reigning winner Austin Dillon. With seven NASCAR Series Champions racing at Daytona: Three in Ford’s and Two apiece in Chevy’s and Toyota’s.

As Jimmy Johnson, the racing driver, not Super Bowl winning Coach; Hya! Is the most decorated Driver in the field, as he’s the only Two-times Daytona 500 Winner, along with attempting to win his record 8th NASCAR Championship this year, so Move Over Tom Brady!

SHEEHZ! That’s the Most effort I’ve ever put into learnin’ about the DayToner 500’s current line-up or RASSCAR’ Taxicabland Bomber Pilotes’ contesting Duh GURR-REAT! Race…

Yet in another nod to the changing times, and NASCAR’s Desperation to appease Fans, Manufacturers and most definitely it’s Bottom-line, the race is being paced by Semi-retired Driver ‘lil E’, nee Dale Earnhardt, Jr., whose father was known as “The Intimidator,” although I preferred “Ironhead!”

As Dale Jnr will lead the field to the Green Flag in none other than a PickemUp’ Truck, a Chebbie’ Silverado, which I believe is Roundy-Rounds’ first Pickup Pace Truck? Which surely FOX “Expert Analyst” Mr. Boogity-Boogity-Boogity’, nee ‘Ol DW’, aka Darrell Waltrip will claim is another “First” for RASSCAR’, BARF!

As ‘Ol DW’s got a knack for Championing RASSCAR’, as it’s very Hard to believe this year’s Day Toner’s the 30th Anniversary of when I watched him Doin’ His Icky Shuffle impersonation in Victory lane; YOUCH! As Talk ’bout Datin’ yourself, Eh?

Since actually the Indianapolis 500 has used not one, but two Pace Trucks, for which one ranks as my most Ugly Pace vehicle ever at the Hallowed “Brickyard!” Being the 2002 Oldsmobile Bravado; Err, Uhm I meant Bravada, which Johnny Mellonhead’s former wife Elaine Irwin drove.

Whilst No Fenders Tacoma Bureau Chief Mary Ellen tried Flagging Down a Castoff of the other rare Pace Truck a few years ago; But I Digress…

What was that Mysterious vehicle that wouldn’t Stop for us…

As who’ll win this year’s 61st Daytona 500? And more importantly, how many will sit thru the race’s four hours Commercial-fest? Not to mention the 90mins Pre-amble, Eh?

As ‘Ol DW’ will Bark on Sunday afternoon; Boogity-Boogity-Boogity! Let’s Go Racin’ Boys!


Tags: Racing · Misc · Nascar · NFL Football · Uncategorized

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