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Santa Throwing Snowballs, strikes Out Seattle’s Sports Teams over a Wintery Weekend…

December 31st, 2017 · No Comments

Ah, just like ‘Ol St Nick, who’s busy loading up his sleigh, and don’t forget Rudolf Santa! Your El Senor Sportyblog Scribe Tomaso has been busy whiling’ thou days away…

By now Y’all know that the Japanese Baseball player denoted as the Japanese “Babe Ruth,” aka Shohei Ohtani, has signed with the Gasp! Los Angeles Angels.

STEE-RIKE ONE!

As the first Santa Fastball 99-miler-per-hour strike was thrown directly at Seattle’s Mariners! As apparently part of Ohtani’s desires to not play in Seattle was the immediate comparisons that would be made between him and future MLB Hall of Famer ichiro Suzuki.

Angels introduce Japanese Star Shohei Ohtani, their prized signing

As the News of Shohei’s choice in the Ohtani Sweepstakes was announced Friday morning, Dec 8th, with the next stop upon Santa’s Snowballs escapade appropriately being Up North Eh!

As Toronto’s BMO Field was the next Port ‘O Call the following day, where the defending 2016 MLS Champion Seattle Sounders FC were pitted in a rematch for this year’s title vs. Toronto FC, Saturday, December 9th.

STEE-RIKE TWO!

Although I have NO idea if it made any difference or not? I cannot help thinking that Roman Torres re-enactment of his Sudden Death Shootout Winning Goal during the morning’s final training session on Toronto’s home pitch - prior to the MLS Cup motivated Toronto even further?

As Toronto FC’s Head Coach was vindicated for making his team’s last minute formation change to a classic 4-4-2 vs. Seattle, which many pundits questioned prior to Kickoff.

And the Sounders FC were completely outplayed the entire match, whilst Thar local radio’s Colour Commentator Casey Keller, the team’s original Goalkeeper, who’s definitely not a Seattle Apologist! Mockingly noted at the 30-minute mark how Seattle had finally taken their first shot on goal! Which was more than last year’s entire MLS Cup. Although Toronto thrashed the Rave Green with twelve shots taken on Stefan Fry vs. Seattle’s measly one during the games opening 45mins.

As I wistfully opined during halftime that it would need to be Clint Dempsey scoring once to give Seattle an unexpected One-Nil victory, which as we all know, wasn’t destined to happen.

Instead it was one of Dempsey’s U.S. Men’s National Team (USMNT) team-mates, who I’ve adorned as Josie The Pussycat; Meow! As Jozy Altidore craftily shot the go-ahead goal over a lunging Fry to put Toronto ahead One-Nil in the game’s 67th minute.

And the rest as they say is History, as Toronto’s Cherry on top exclamation point was made with a second goal being scored in the 94th minute of the game, during the additional Stoppage time added, giving Toronto FC, the year’s best Major League Soccer Club, with an impressive 20-5-9 record an emphatic Two-Nil MLS Cup victory.

This time the Better Team Won, and Seattle knows it

STEE-RIKE THREE!

Then on Sunday, December 10th, ‘Ol Santa completed the Inning by making the once mighty Seattle Seahawks go WHOOPH! As Seattle just never was quite in the game on the road vs. the Jacksonville Jaguars, eventually losing 30-24, albeit in a game far closer than the following week’s Humiliation at Home!

Y’all know, when the once lowly “Lambs” came to town and totally dismantled Seattle! As I begrudgingly listened until halftime, with the LA Rams trouncing Seattle 34-0!

And then in Thy Bestest ‘Ol Dandy Don (Meredith) impersonation, I turned Off the Radio, since the Hawks’ Party was Definitely Over! As Seattle would go onto lose an unthinkable 42-7, being Blown-out at Home NO less, where the usually raucous 12s’, known for their Deafening knack of causing opposing teams to jump Offside’s and being flagged for false starts due to noise, sat absolutely Stunned!

And that’s before Seattle travels to Dallas to face Dem Kuh-boyz’, as it’s doubtful the Seahawks will beat the Cowboys at Jerry’s Palace, as I don’t think Santa’s leaving any NFL Playoff games in Seattle’s Stockings!

As the Hawks need to win twice, have the Rams lose twice. The Miami Dolphins swim upstream, Buffalo get blanked in a Snowstorm. The Browns win a game and Tennessee defeat the Colts; Whale’ that last one’s not too difficult, eh?

But then again if the Hawks get into a Kicking game vs. Arizona, I’m pretty certain the Cardinals gots’ the better kicker; YOWSA! But just ask the Titans ’bout Arizona’s kicker, whilst Seattle’s got The Blair Walsh Project!

Meanwhile, hopefully ‘Ol Santa will be kinder to the DAWGS’, as the University of Washington Huskies will travel to The Valley of the Sun to play the Penn State Nitny Lions, who were once coached by the legendary Joe Paterno, in this year’s Fiesta Bowl in Glendale, AZ, at the Cardinals home stadium…

G-O DAWGS!

Tags: Misc · soccer · NFL Football · MLB Baseball · College Football · Uncategorized


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